Best friends fade….hair falls out….but you will always be YOU

Blog featured on the Fred Hutch Survivorship Program: Best friends fade….hair falls out….but you will always be YOU

I never fully understood how important and attached I was to my hair—until I lost it.  My hair was my best friend.  It was always with me, kept me warm and safe, and most of all, we shared great memories.  Whether it was extraordinary vacations, delicious dinners, dance parties or just fun day-to-day activities, my hair was by my side.

When it was time to start chemotherapy, I somehow thought my best friend would never leave.  I felt our love could prevent this poison from destroying our friendship.  I told her that I would not shave her off if she promised to not fall out.  In my mind, we created the perfect pact, and I somehow felt more confident starting chemo because I knew we could rely on one another.  I took especially good care of her.  I even washed her less frequently so that her roots would hold on tight and not feel the harsh water pressure beat down on her fragile self.

After the second round of chemo, I felt betrayed.  I was in the shower, and out of the corner of my eye, I saw a huge, dark clump of her lying peacefully on the shower tiles.  My eyes widened with disbelief as I held her in my wet, shriveled hand.  The sense of betrayal was nauseating—I felt as if a knife dug into my heart.  The sad thing is, deep down I knew I could not blame her.  I knew this was coming but somehow felt our love for one another could overcome the effects of chemo.

Our relationship started to spiral downhill.  Tensions were high, and we did not know how to relate to one another anymore.  She was falling out more and more as I entered the halfway mark of my chemotherapy.  I became self-conscious and embarrassed of her.  She could not control it, I know, but she started shedding everywhere—on my pillow, on my clothes.  I would even walk into clumps of her camouflaged on the floor.  She crept and clung to my skin, creating the sensation of bugs crawling on me.  I grew more anxious as her obnoxious ways interfered with my social life.  She was yelling for attention by falling out in chunks when I moved my hair to the side, when I ran my fingers through her or even more embarrassing: if she got caught on a button or zipper.

I hit my breaking point. My other half, my best friend, a piece of me that created a part of my identity had disappeared, and I felt I disappeared with her.  I felt as though people could not know the real me without her.  The question: “Who am I?”, swirled in my head.  How was I supposed to hold onto my mental and physical self while the chemo was destroying me?

This inability to control what was happening challenged my ego to a point of no return.  Staring into a mirror, I no longer saw the confident, sexy, sophisticated, funny girl I knew and loved.  Instead, I saw a sad, yellow-skinned, balding girl who looked lost and lonely.  In order to keep going, I dug deep inside of myself and discovered a thread of confidence and the strength to keep going even though I did not have my partner in crime. 

About 3/4 the way through my chemo, many friends and family friends offered advice: “Why don’t you just shave your head and embrace it?” That word SHAVE brought chills to my spine. SHAVE? If I shaved my head then I truly would be bald, and that meant looking like a ‘real’ cancer patient.  At this point, my hair really did look pathetic.  I would not have been able to admit it then, but looking in our scrapbook made me realize how sad we looked together.  Holding onto this pathetic excuse of a ponytail was, in my mind, my way of holding onto my femininity, sexuality and control.  It was my way of not allowing myself to feel or really look sick.  The fear of looking and being sick haunted me and swung over my head like a dark, gloomy cloud.

I managed to make it through chemotherapy without shaving her.  I let her grow back naturally and gave her shape-up trims where I could.  However, our relationship was different this time around.  I realized I did not rely on her to give me a sense of identity and confidence anymore.  Hitting a point in my life where I felt lost, mangled and confused allowed me to do some intense soul searching. I no longer felt the need to hang on to external values.  Instead, I was able to tap in on a deeper level and find my new best friend—my inner self.

Completing chemotherapy taught me much more than I ever could have imagined. I realized that, in the end, all we truly can control are our own thoughts, emotions and actions.  Losing my hair was something I couldn’t control.  Having yellowish skin due to chemo was something I couldn’t control.  I could allow myself to spiral into a depression and hold onto anger and a sense of betrayal or I could consciously choose to feel and think something different.  Instead of letting the external world influence my identity and confidence, I turned inwards for strength.  I connected to my inner self, soul and the values that I consciously live by.  I knew I was lucky to be breathing, so I simply chose to be grateful and find the beauty and light in every situation.  Allowing myself to focus on the positive in life granted me a sense of freedom and space to explore my identity.

When you feel like life is out of control, tap in and find your inner best friend. Your beautiful energy can always shine no matter what tribulations surround you.  Discover your values and live them each day so you can connect to your true essence, which will never fall out or fade away. 

Sniffling in Seattle

I am suffering from serious allergies here in the Pacific Northwest.  My entire face feels like it is vacuum-sealed shut, preventing me from fully breathing. Anyone who has ever suffered from allergies knows how uncomfortable it is to breathe out of your mouth constantly while tied to a tissue box.  I have lost all sense of taste and smell, replaced by a cloudy sense of vision and hearing.  Due to my physically-uncomfortable state, I have been irritable, unmotivated, and unable to stay present.  After two weeks, I finally hit a wall.

The frustration in my body and mind inspired me to do some journaling—to dig to the bottom of my true emotions.  An aha moment arose when I realized I wasn’t feeling like myself because I wasn’t truly breathing.  Not breathing deeply made my body feel more tight and anxious.  Sensing this constant agitation prevented me from being present in the moment and living with ease.  It also made my hands and taste buds want to persistently snack and eat because I couldn’t taste anything to feel satisfied!  Constantly snacking made me feel out of balance.  Feeling out of balance averted me from consciously being able to express myself—creating a vicious cycle—until I took the time and space to pause, breathe (in this case sniffle), reflect on my thoughts and emotions and then release.  I was mindfully able to let go of this frustration and allow my mind and body to defog.

I am inspired to share this mini story with you because I find this to be a perfect example of how important our breath is.  When you are not fully breathing you are not fully living. Breath is our life force.  It gives our cells oxygen, providing our body energy to keep moving forward.  When you aren’t breathing, you don’t have energy to feed and fuel the strength of your body.  When you don’t feel strong, it is hard to feel present and in tune to your brilliance.  When we can’t connect to our brilliance, we are not able to see the opportunities and possibilities of life.  Therefore, I encourage you to breathe deeply. Constantly come back to your breath.  Find your life force and consciously live from it.  Allow your breath to recharge you and keep you centered, focused and on your brilliant path.  Know that your breath is your friend and is there to help you live a healthier and happier life.

8 Simple Steps to Master Mindful Snacking

I remember my mom asking me a very wise question when I was about 10 years old.  I had asked her for a snack before bedtime and she curiously responded: “What part of you is hungry? Are your eyes hungry? Are your hands hungry? Are your taste buds hungry? Are you thirsty? Or is your belly actually hungry?”

I remember having an Oprah, “Aha moment.”  It struck me that the sensation I was experiencing before bedtime might not be true hunger.  I took a moment to pause and replied: “My taste buds are hungry.”  My mom asked if I still wanted a snack since I wasn’t “truly hungry” and I indeed did, so she cut me up a juicy orange.

Since that evening, I pay attention to my inner dialogue because I realize I snack when I am not truly hungry.  Today, I ask myself: “Ok, am I actually hungry?  Or am I just trying to satisfy some other part of me?”  Sometimes, asking myself this question, I realize that only my eyes are hungry because something looks so good.  Other times, I realize my hands are hungry because I am feeling bored.  And sometimes I realize I am indeed hungry!  Usually, I listen to my voice of reason and snack mindfully.  Other times, I ignore my body and overindulge.   Snack or no snack, I check back in with myself to evaluate how I feel and grow more conscious of how my body reacts.

Learning to listen to yourself is a skill that takes time.  Learning to understand and obey what your body needs is a talent.  I am constantly working on both. The simple intention to understand what is going on in your mind and body is foundational.  Working this mindfulness muscle strengthens your connection to your feelings and thoughts.  This way, when you are snacking, potential feelings of guilt dissipate because you are conscious of where that urge is coming from and how to appropriately satisfy the craving.  You will eventually grow so strong that you will be fully present with each bite, chew and swallow—able to identify which part of your body you are actually feeding.  Until then, treat yourself with love and kindness while you learn to pay attention to your mind, body and how you feed it.

Follow these simple 8 steps to master mindful snacking:

1.     Pause and connect to your breath

2.     Ask yourself: “What part of me is truly hungry?”

3.     Make your snacking decision based on what your body truly desires

4.     Check back in with yourself to understand how your decision made you feel

5.     Make non-judgmental observations

6.     Breathe

7.     Let go and carry on with the rest of your day

8.     Send yourself love and kindness

Naked Brilliance

Helmut Newton's "Celia, Miami, 1991"

I love walking around my house naked.  There is nothing more comforting to me then being in my own skin, in my own apartment.  Growing up in a predominately naked household, I learned how to wear my birthday suit at a young age.  Since I can remember, my siblings and I were set free to play in our backyard naked.  This commitment to being free and comfortable deepened as I got older.  Both of my parents taught me that the naked body is a gorgeous and remarkable work of art and we should never be afraid to be who we are and love our own skin.  My friends and I joked that they weren’t truly my friend until they saw my mom naked.

I never realized how lucky I was to learn these lessons at such a young age until meeting many other women who have a hard time being in their own skin, let alone naked.  I first recognized this sense of embarrassment in high school when changing in front of my girlfriends. While in college, I realized, I was one of the only roommates who enjoyed being naked around the house.  I was shocked to discover how nakedness made others feel uncomfortable.

Cultivating a comfortable, naked environment is liberating.  It allows you to feel fully connected to who you are by being able to see and feel your entire body.  When we wear clothes all of the time, we create a slight barrier.  When I am naked, I am mindful of how I feel in both my body and mind, thus allowing me to be present with my authentic self.  I am able to listen to my mind and release any judgments that try to creep in.  Getting to know my body on a deeper level increases my confidence, strength and even makes me feel a bit sexier!

I encourage you to spend some more time being naked in the comfort of your own home.  Whether this be sleeping naked, dancing naked, making your morning coffee naked, or writing emails naked. Ditch the clothes and show some skin! After spending some quality time with your naked personality, you will appreciate how good it feels to love your skin and be who you are.  Allow any judgments or negative thoughts to disappear and just be with your beautiful skin.  Notice how your true brilliance shines!

Create Food, Warmth, and Smiles... All Year Long!

Another holiday season has come and gone. The time of year when people pause their work life to spend a little more time with their family and friends--cultivating a sense of community and warmth.  I know the holiday season may be daunting to some; however, for me, it is a special time for all of my favorite things: family, friends, food and fitness.  Simply because the holidays are over does not mean the party has to end. My recent trip to the Palm Beach Wine and Food Festival reminded me of just that.  It was an extraordinary, five-day festival that tickled all of my senses.  My sister, Sweet Loren, brought me to this event as her assistant.  As a foodie, a lover of people, and an avid beach walker, I was in heaven!  Every morning, I took a walk on the beach and spent some time meditating in the sun.  The days became more decadent when we ventured off to 3 course lunches and dinners--tasting delicious food created by some of the best chefs in America.  Francios Payard prepared my favorite meal of the week.  The lunch started off with a fresh crab salad, followed by a mouth watering miso-glazed Chilean sea bass, followed by a decadent stuffed quail, and finished with a mind-blowing hazelnut candy bar dessert.  Tasting these flavors and experiencing the rhythm of the meal with strangers was so inspirational for my soul.  Eating such beautiful food in a communal setting created an atmosphere of warmth, smiles and mindfulness.  I watched myself and others let down their barriers, share their stories and fill their bodies with love as we all ate, tasted and savored each bite.

I walked away from this dream-like week with a deeper sense of gratitude and appreciation for the human spirit-- understanding we are all humans who strive to connect to one another and grow from our experiences.  I was reminded that a delicious meal can act as a vehicle for cultivating meaningful relationships.  So just because the holidays are over does not mean we should stop putting intention and love into the meals we create and the people we share them with.  Instead, it should inspire us to deepen our relationships and put more effort into what we are doing and whom we are doing them with.  Allowing ourselves to still take pleasure in celebrating each day, each other, and what we feed ourselves. Allow the nourishment and warmth of the holidays to continue throughout the year.  Create special memories and moments with strangers and loved ones.  Witness how sharing meals open up doors of generosity, laughs, support and love.

Empower your words. Empower your life.

words-words-words

The new year creates a sense of hope, optimism and desire for a fresh beginning.  We tend to start off telling ourselves that this year is going to be different because of X, Y and Z.  However, come February 1, some of us might find ourselves falling back into old and “comfortable” habits.  So,  how can you assure that this won’t happen again this year?  What are some of the ways you can connect to yourself on a deeper level and stay true to your intentions and live the life you want to be living?  

One of the small, yet huge differences you can make in your daily life is paying attention to both your internal and external dialogues.  These are the words you tend to hear yourself saying out loud or in your own head.  Notice what your thoughts and beliefs are.   Do you hear yourself saying phrases like “I can’t, “I could never,” “I should,” “I ought to,” “I must,” or even referring to someone else and saying “they made me.”  When you say these phrases, you create helpless energy inside yourself and project it around you.  Saying such ineffective words can make you feel weak, disempowered, worthless, unmotivated and even lazy.  When we speak in such a fashion we are not moving forward in life.  Instead, our thoughts imprison us.  Be mindful of your word choices and feel empowered!  Use words and phrases such as, “I get to,” “I have the opportunity to,” “I can,” “I am able to,” “I look forward to,” “I choose to,” “I am grateful for,”and “I am lucky to.”  All of these word choices leave you with a sense of authority because there is clear intention and ownership.  Owning your words (even if you have to force it in the beginning) will bring you one step closer to owning your life.  

Try focusing on your word choices for as little as one week to see if you notice a difference in your mood, behavior and sense of purpose.  Feel empowered to be who you are and what you are doing.  Feel the strength and determination to create clear intentions.  Focusing this energy will bring you one step closer to sticking with any resolutions you may have made.

I know that owning “I can” empowered me to follow my passion of becoming a life coach.  I never let the words “I can’t” hold me prisoner and prevent me from fulfilling my sense of purpose.  Owning my words allows my beliefs, thoughts and feelings to be limitless.  I am living in a world full of possibilities.

I encourage you to share your experiences with me.  First ask yourself: “How is this current way of speaking serving me?”  Then, once you find your answers, ask yourself: “What ways can I make conscious shifts and start owning my words?”  “How does it feel to say more empowering phrases?”  “What differences do I notice in my life?” 

If you have any questions please feel free to contact me.  I look forward to reading them!

New Year. New Perspective. Same YOU.

The New Year is a upon us so there is no time like the present to PAUSE, REFLECT, BECOME AWARE and ACT.  I believe that the New Year is not only a time to make resolutions and visualize your future, but it is also a time to reflect and appreciate your past.  Without understanding your history and habits, there is no room for you to grow and expand in the present and future.  That is why I invite you to take some time to get in touch with yourself and reflect on what you learned in 2013.  Realize all you have accomplished (and I mean ALL!! Including books, projects or even mini tasks).  Be proud of the mountains you have climbed, whither they be big or small, and allow all of that confidence and positive energy to boost you forward into the new year. Let go of your worries, fears and doubts, and hold onto your inner strength and wisdom.  Remember, you can achieve whatever you want this year! Below are some helpful reflection questions to ask yourself as you learn about 2013.  Once you have completed those, answer the visioning questions for 2014 and see where you want to go this year.  A fun activity is to place your answers in a sealed envelope and wait until next year at this time to open it.  This way you will gain a deeper sense of reflection for 2015.

When you look back at 2013, what stands out to you?

What are you grateful for?

What skills did you learn/improve?

What big/ small mountains did you climb?

How did you challenge yourself?

How did you treat yourself?

What strengths have people complimented you on?

What healthy habits did you work on?

What self-awareness have you gained?

What is your favorite thing about yourself?

What 3 activities do you do to treat yourself on a regular basis?

Visualizing the future: What values do you want to live by?

In 2014, what are 5 items (big or small) you want to accomplish/ master? Learn to articulate what you want in life.

How can you connect and live as your authentic self this year? What would need to change?

When you close your eyes, center yourself with your breath, and allow your creative mind to visualize the future, what do you see? Describe the colors, sights, sounds, tastes, people, location and even emotions.  What arises for you?

What healthy habits do you want to incorporate into your daily routine? What would that look like?

What skill of yours would you like to strengthen?

What would you like to do more of this year?

How can you create a healthy life work balance?

What gifts do you want give to the world?

3 years, 3 years 3 months.

WadeCoffee2

Three years this week since I finished chemotherapy.  Three years three months since my mother lost her battle to cancer.  It has been a long and turbulent road filled with anxiety, heartache, and uncertainty, but I am here today standing tall, strong and centered. Life does not always unfold how we imagine. There are elements of surprise and sometimes elements of shock.  For instance, 2010 surprisingly started out to be the best year of my life. I was off to study abroad in Buenos Aires, where adventures, excitement and lust lay in the palm of my hand.  But how quickly life can shift and turn.  Not only was I smacked with a cancer diagnosis, ripped away from my study abroad experience, but worst of all, I lost the most precious person in my life at a time when I needed her most.  When life interrupts you, there are two options.  You can either crumble in the presence of turbulence or you can face the day practicing three components: Breath, Balance and Brilliance.  I chose the latter.  I chose to not let these life interruptions knock me down.  Instead, I practiced mindfulness by centering myself with my breath.  I maintained balance by incorporating physical activity into my daily regime to feel strong and stable.  And most of all, I lived each day Brilliantly.  Living Brilliantly means that I was connecting to my creative energy where I could stay open, honest and see the opportunity in everything.  Living by these three principles, brought me to a place of inner peace, light and acceptance.  I was able to finish my six months of chemotherapy, say goodbye to my mother, graduate college, move back to Argentina, find love, and solidify my passion to help others feel mentally and physically fit.

I am thrilled to announce the launch of my Life Coaching career. Celebrating my mission to help other young adults faced with life interruptions survive and thrive by practicing the principles of Breath, Balance, Brilliance.  Ensuring that this survival packet can get anyone through the darkest of days.

Turn That Frown Upside Down

Have you ever been stressed, anxious, hurt or nervous? What did those feelings feel like? Did you feel the emotion not only in your mind, but in some part of your body as well? If so, what sensations arose? It makes complete sense that our emotions will not only be discovered in the brain, but also be felt somewhere in the body. Our mind and body are connected! What you think and how you react affects your nervous system, which affects your overall well-being.  When you feel stressed you may feel this sensation in your neck, lower back or even your head.  When these displaced pockets of emotion arise in the body, it is a sign that one is not in control of his/her emotions and is not balanced.  Negative vibes have infiltrated the mind and body, weakening the nervous system, which can be very detrimental to one’s health.  In order to help release some of these toxic emotions from the mind and body, YOU must learn to keep your thoughts positive and judgment free. Train your mind to let go of negativity and view situations with a positive twist.  This simple trick will do you wonders!

Suggestions: Spend some time sitting with yourself. Draw your attention inwards.  Notice if there are pockets of tension throughout the body and slowly draw awareness to why you feel tense. Learn to connect the physical feeling to the emotion. Notice how your mind wanders to a negative sentiment.  This is completely normal, however, not what you want to turn into a habit.  Instead, try acknowledging that negative emotion or thought and twist it into a positive one. Let that negative weight float away while you try to view life with more positives!  Sometimes it may feel hard to see the good in something, but trust the process and realize it is there. Own that positive perspective and envision it.  Over time, you will watch tension disappear from your body, and you will live a happier and lighter life because you have found YOUR positives from within so you depend less on the outside world for reinforcement.

Don't Fall Back. Reflect Forward.

There is an energy shift in the Northern hemisphere as we enter into Fall where the weather cools down and the sun sets earlier.  A more rhythmic routine enters into our lives as everyone settles into the flow of back to school and back to business. We salvage the days where we get those final tastes of summer, before the cooler days set in.  We get to observe nature go into hibernation and rest up for its busy months of spring and summer.  Unlike the trees and flowers, we humans do not get a long extended break from our lives to recharge.  Instead, we need to take time each day to PAUSE, BREATHE, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT, and ACT.   We need to check in with ourselves and make sure we are living happy, healthy and true lives. A new season brings upon the opportunity to renew oneself, so try asking yourself: What lessons have you learned? What skills would you like to grow? What goals would you like to achieve?  PAUSING, BREATHING and REFLECTING on yourself are powerful tools to bring mindfulness into your daily life so you can feel recharged and invigorated throughout the winter months. Suggestions: Take and make the time in your day to connect to yourself.  Think about your values and goals and take action in creating a life where you are your healthiest and joyous self! Enjoy time meditating, taking walks, cooking, writing, dancing or creating art.  Remember to not FALL back, but REFLECT forward.  Be YOUR best self!

The Power of Our Steps

Walking is one of my most favorite activities. Born and raised in a “walking family,” I grew up learning to keep up with my dad’s pace and mentally preparing myself for long journeys wherever we went, yet it was not until I was a senior in high school when I gained my own appreciation for the sport. My love blossomed when I decided to wear a pedometer for my senior project. My goal was to walk 10,000 steps (about 5 miles) every day for 3 weeks while I raised money for an Obesity organization. After my second week, I felt a tremendous difference in my mood and body. I felt I had a stronger mind-body connection since I was moving more and getting the blood flowing. I paid attention to what I ate and how I felt on my walks. I also noticed I was just happier! No wonder a study at the California University in Long Beach found that the phenomenon of walking helps people to “ be happier, have higher self-esteem, be more into your diet.” I carried my enthusiasm for walking to the University of Michigan where I walked from North Campus to Central Campus most days (weather permitting). People began to know me as “the walker.” I realized that wherever I went, it would probable take me 15 minutes longer to walk than to rely on bus transportation—so why not get some mental and physical exercise in, while spending time outside and saving money!? I now incorporate walking into my daily routine as my staple form of transportation. Not only do I get time to think, but I feel more connected to myself and the world around me. I aim to inspire other’s to get moving and realize walking is a lot easier and more enjoyable than jumping into a car. My boyfriend and I also created a routine to take evening walks as a way to help with digestion, enjoy each other’s company and reflect on the day. I have even noticed that night walks have improved my sleeping patterns!

Suggestions: Get walking! Learn to get those steps in wherever you can. Try walking up the stairs instead of taking the elevator; challenge yourself to take walks during your breaks throughout the day, add nighttime walk-caps or swap happy hour for a walk in the park with a friend. Get moving and you will feel the mental and physical difference after just one week!

Cooking Up Nourishment for YOUR Mind and Body

I have always been a foodie for as long as I can remember. This is due to growing up in a house where my family didn’t even finish its first meal of the day before discussing what we would eat next. We grew up trying to make each meal delicious, nutritious and of course: satisfying. I never use to take part in the cooking since I was the youngest of 3 siblings in a house where everyone was an amazing chef. I was, however, very much involved in the planning, critiquing and of course, 'dish duty'. It wasn't until I moved to Buenos Aires that my passion to eat good food expanded to learning how to cook yummy food as well. As I began to cook for myself, I realized how difficult cooking something delicious actually is. It took sometime to get my hands dirty and feel comfortable around the kitchen. I started to enjoy cooking more and more because I was not only creating more delicious meals, but it became another form of meditation. I realized sometimes I felt rushed to cook for no reason that I would chop my vegetables too fast and unevenly that my meal would end up a bit discombobulated and not as enjoyable. So instead, I learned to use my cooking time as a way to PAUSE, BREATHE, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT and ACT. I used the action of chopping as a way to slow down my mind and breathe so I could cut with intention. I also worked on controlling my mind by being patient while boiling water or sauteing food. This waiting time works to breathe and enjoy the process of cooking--whether it be solo or with loved ones. The act of cooking something homemade means you are filling your mind and body with good intentions and love. You have thought about what ingredients and spices sound the most satisfying and nurturing to your body, allowing you to get to know yourself on a deeper level.

Suggestion: Start cooking! Whether it be after you come home from work or on the weekends. Make time to cook something delicious instead of picking up the phone and ordering in. You will be shocked at not only how much money you will save, but how much more satisfying meals will be, and you might just lose a bit of that extra weight! Plan out your meals ahead of time by thinking of fun recipes to try or just follow your instinct and through a bunch of things together. While you are cooking, pay attention to yourself and do not allow yourself to get anxious or frustrated. Remember the motto to PAUSE, BREATHE, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT, and ACT. Fill your meal with love and compassion by taking the time to make it that much more delicious and nutritious. When you focus on the task at hand and are in the moment, you always do a better job than letting your mind race in a million directions. Notice how much tastier, satisfying and visually pleasing your meals will be. Enjoy your meal by eating slowly so you can taste each bite and discover what improvements could be made to the recipe. Take note of how the food nourishes your mind and body so that you learn to fill yourself with only positive things!

Remember: You have one mind and one body, so let's learn to use them right! (and feed it right!)

New-Beginnings

Happy New Year Everyone! Luckily, the world did not end as the Mayan Calendar predicted; rather, others are marking 2013 as the year of ‘New-Beginnings.’ I find this particularly applicable given many important chapters in my life finally came to a close at the end of this year. Even though it can be sad to move on from the past, it is also exciting to look to the future--full of endless possibilities. We can never predict what our future might hold for us, but we can control our actions. It is important to make some time for yourself to follow the mantra: PAUSE, BREATHE, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT and ACT.

I was lucky enough to create some time while I was on the beach gazing into the Atlantic Ocean. It was a peaceful place for me to PAUSE, BREATHE, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT and ACT. I feel connected to the Atlantic because some of my mother’s ashes are there, and I feel her spirit when I stand in the water. I took the time to PAUSE my mind and body, BREATHE in the fresh ocean air, BECOME AWARE of myself and my surroundings, and REFLECT on this past year. I thought about how lucky I am to be standing here healthy, happy and breathing--while sadly, my dear mother is not. I realized I must continue to breathe and live for her and was inspired to not waste my breathe on petty issues or unpleasant situations. I must continue to ACT by living life to the fullest and accomplishing my own dreams and goals.

Suggestions: Follow the mantra to PAUSE, BREATHE, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT and ACT. Create time to think about this past year and the goals you have accomplished and the people whose lives you have touched. Then think about this future year. Create a list of ways you can become a better YOU. I am not suggesting to create New Years resolutions (like going to the gym more) that don’t necessarily stick, but spend some time reflecting on your behaviors and create ways that you can slowly and consciously ACT. For instance, waking up in the morning with an optimistic perspective, smiling more throughout your day or just becoming aware of how you interact with yourself and others. Remember this is the year of ‘New- Beginnings’, so don’t let your past hold you back. Make sure YOU ACT and live each day bigger, better, and brighter than ever before!

Don’t waste your breath. You have one body and one mind, so make friends with them!

Looking to Nature

Have you ever been in a gorgeous place, trying to relax, but can't stop your mind from racing? This happens to me a lot. For instance, I was in the park last week trying to read and enjoy the springtime in Buenos Aires. I felt at such peace on this lazy Sunday, yet somehow I could not slow down my mind to concentrate on my book. In these instances, I usually use my mantra of "PAUSE, BREATHE, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT and ACT" in order to gain control. Connecting with my breathe usually helps me slow down and center myself; however, in this instance, I was not able to gain control. So, I used another tool my mother had taught me. She taught me to direct my attention on something living in nature—be it a piece of grass, a leaf, flowers, or a tree. Spending energy on something living in nature helps to slow down, enter into the present moment and become aware of your surroundings.

While I lay in the park, I focused my energy on a gorgeous tree that stood in front of me. I told myself not just to look at the tree but to slow my mind down and focus on the shape of the leaves, the curves of the bark, and the length of the branches. Spending my energy gazing at every curve helped me slow down. It helped me reconnect with myself and be in the present. Taking that pause is important since it helps you appreciate where and who you are. It helps you to appreciate the beauty and simplicity of the world while you gain control of your thoughts and behaviors.

We must let the beauty and natural discourse of nature influence our lives. For instance, nature demonstrates how we should maintain composure and tranquility. Everything in nature flows to the natural rhythm of life instead of fighting against the currents as some of us humans do. We need to create an image and sense of nature within us so we may stand strong and tall likes trees and mountains while laying still and reflective like lakes and ponds. Always staying peaceful, open, and poised as the natural current of life continues to flow.

Suggestions: The next time you feel your monkey-mind jumping around, try to PAUSE, BREATHE, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT and ACT. Get control of your breath and ACT by directing your energy on a flower, tree, piece of grass or even a piece of fruit! Anything green and living that is in front of you. Spend some time studying that piece of nature and notice its size, texture, color, shape and maybe even smell. Make a detailed sketch of the object in your mind so you can slow down to appreciate its beauty. When you are finished, notice how much more centered and strong you feel. Understand that you will have a deeper appreciation for not only your own mind and body but also for the living world that surrounds you.

Why do we RUSH?

Time. Time is a very precious yet scary 'thing'. Time seems to control our whole way of functioning given it organizes our lives--defining goals, deadlines and occasions. It marks our aging and sense of progress as both individuals and a society. We don’t really realize how fast time passes because we become so entrenched in the goals at hand that we lose sight of how precious each moment truly is. We do not recognize or appreciate that once this moment passes, we will never get it back. This sense that time is precious and we need to be as efficient and successful as possible creates an anxiety that infiltrates American Culture. People’s minds and bodies are filled with this constant need to be doing something, achieving something or rushing to some place. People feel like they should graduate college by a certain age, have a specific “respectable” job, be married by their thirties and live life according to a pre-designed rubric. However, we put too much pressure on ourselves to get from point A to point B by a certain time that we miss everything in between. We end up losing sight of who we truly are or what we truly want in life. I am especially targeting the twenty-something year olds, as this is a time in our lives to discover and explore ourselves. Everyone around me, myself included, feels this pressure to already be someone and be something according to the ideals of society. It is hard to break free from these societal norms when we live and breathe them everyday. I am not saying we should all wander life free of responsibility, plans or goals, but attention should be focused on each moment and each breath we take. Acting with intention each day to our TRUE selves and personal ideals; not letting time and societal pressures control our lives. If there is one thing I have learned, it is that life never goes according to plan, so why create one set in stone? Live in the moment and learn to hear yourself. Learn to hear yourself so you can hear others better. Suggestions: Get to know YOURSELF. Know what YOU like--or be open to seeing, tasting, listening, feeling and experiencing the world around you. Have experiences so that you may learn and grow as a person. Don’t let your life be ruled by time or expectations. Take advantage of the moment, and make it yours! You never know who you might meet or what you might experience that could change your life.